Category: 99 problems

Advocare 10 Day Cleanse Link-Up Results!

*My original post:
I ordered some clothes from Aeropostale last week. I got them in and tried them on and decided I have to lose at least 5 lbs to fit into them comfortably. So I tossed back a bottle of wine and cried myself to sleep. I woke up the next morning and I saw this link-up….
Join the Advocare 10 Day Cleanse blogger link-up! Learn more at 
I’m new here. I’ve never participated in a link-up before, but I am now. This link-up is for a diet. We’re doing a 10 day cleanse to kick start losing pounds before summer. Join, if you dare, and then link up with Raven!

I lost 5.5 lbs y’all!!

I followed the shit out the diet, shake, and herbal instructions. They were a little confusing, so I went over them in detail and entered what to take/drink as reminders in my phone. Some mornings, my phone would beep and it the reminder would say “drink shake”. Other mornings, it would say “take herbal supplement”. It kept me in check and made it much easier to follow.
I forgot that I wasn’t supposed to eat starches and I ate potatoes twice. I also forgot all about my diet and had a beer on Day 9. So I had a couple of slips ups, but I followed the suggested diet closer than anything I have followed my entire life. Aside from a few boy crushes. 😉
So are you ready for the before and after?
I lost 5.5 lbs on the Advocare 10 Day Cleanse pachomp.com
You can see a difference in my thighs, knees, and waist. I can also see a difference in my bra line on my back and my upper arms, but you can’t tell from the photos.
I liked this cleanse because it only took 10 days. I can do anything for 10 days.
The 10 Day Cleanse kicks off the 24 Day Challenge, so now I only have 14 days of dieting left to do to complete the 24 Day Challenge.  I spoke to a friend of mine that sells Advocare and she hooked me up with the materials I need to do the diet part of the 24 day Challenge. Now I’m just trying to eat clean until my vitamins come in. Bring it on!!

Advocare 10 Day Cleanse Link-Up

I ordered some clothes from Aeropostale last week. I got them in and tried them on and decided I have to lose at least 5 lbs to fit into them comfortably. So I tossed back a bottle of wine and cried myself to sleep. I woke up the next morning and I saw this link-up….
Join the Advocare 10 Day Cleanse blogger link-up! Learn more at 
I’m new here. I’ve never participated in a link-up before, but I am now. This link-up is for a diet. We’re doing a 10 day cleanse to kick start losing pounds before summer. Join, if you dare, and then link up with Raven!

Wine Sippy Cup? Yes Please!

I know people that refuse to drink wine from plastic.  I imagine this makes them feel as though they are real wino’s.  NOT IN MY BOOK!!  I will drink wine from almost anything.  I imagine this is what makes me feel as though I am a real wino.  All others are wine snobs.

No More Wine Snobs!!

After busting real wine glasses every time I fall, plastic wine glasses are more my style.  The following picture is of a BOMtini in a plastic wine glass.

The Bomtini

Now, after many moments of spillage and pillage*, I am in dire need of a wine sippy cup.  And guess what?  I’m not the only one!  Apparently, there is a fucking market for that!  Woot woot!

Click on the picture below to buy me one….

Wine Sippy Cup

Classy, indeed.

Wine Snob

*spillage is when the wine sloshes out of the glass, pillage is when I stick my lips to the table/chair/floor to suck up the spillage like a motherfucking boss

Zombie Apocalypse Prep Tip #1

Don’t come running to me when your face is chewed off.

PREPARE YOURSELF!

TIP #1:  ZOMBIE SIMILATION – Fight zombies using airsoft guns in an abandoned mall, because you know you’ll be in a mall with your gun when shit goes down.  Prepare for battle here….

Zombie Shopping Mall Experience

I’m Beau.

Here’s a pointer for you music fans: When you meet the lead singer to a band named after the lead singer, don’t ask him what his fucking name is.

ME with Beau Hinze and the Backporch Shufflers at Belle’s Landing on Saturday, June 16th, 2012.

“…and what’s your name?” I asked Beau of the band, Beau Hinze and the Backporch Shufflers, as if I was a total genius to come up with such a question.

His eyebrows knit together and he hesitates as if to make sure I just asked that question before he realizes I’m not joking and kindly, but questioningly, tells me, “I’m Beau,” with a little emphasis on the “Beau” part just to let me know that I’m an idiot.

Dead pan.

I could try to blame my blunder on alcohol, but I was the DD, so I was perfectly sober. And perfectly capable of knowing his name. And perfectly horrified that I asked a perfectly stupid question.

Anyway, we laughed it off and the band graciously thanked my best friend, Angie, and I for coming out to see them play and then we got all fuzzy so Angie could snap a picture of us.  Thanks, Angie!!

10 on 10: June

I joined the ten on ten photo project this month where you take ten photos over ten hours on the tenth day of the month.  Thank you Rebekah at a bit of sunshine for ten on ten!
10:14 a. m. She has babies hanging on her stomach.
11:05 a. m. Giving Foxy a rubdown before I leave my house.

12:11 p. m. That huge ass drink is what Whataburger calls a medium.



1:03 p. m. Oh, Chris!  There you are.



2:38 p. m. It’s getting warm outside.  Maybe I should watch another movie.



3:13 p. m. Picked up a new suit to suit my wet summer.
4:01 p. m. About to start cleaning wine bottles for our next rack. (Which is peach wine, by the way.)



5:04 p. m. Making crawfish pie.  All Betty Crocker like.



6:01 p. m. Watching Gone and drinking wine.
6:43 p. m. It’s ready!!!!!
8:02 p. m.  It was an hour ago, but I still feel bad.  I’m an idiot.
It’s actually 11 photos.  I’m not sure how I ended up posting 11 instead of 10, but that’s okay.  One to grow on.  I hope you had an excellent Sunday, June 10th, like I did!!!

I Only Thought I was a Failure

You probably don’t remember, but I challenged myself to read 100 books in 2010.  I only read 78 books and posted that I was a complete failure and I cried my way through a drawn out post about the awful books I put myself through trying to reach my goal.  Theeeeen I committed to read 100 books in 2011.  Well, I fucking didn’t, okay?  Don’t ask why.  I just didn’t.

I thought I would let you guess how many books I read and then give the worst book to the winner, but neither of you are going to get it right, so I’ll just tell you.

12. 

Yup. 

Twelve. 

That is 66 less books than in 2010.

I only thought I was a failure back then.

So there are no more reading commitments to save myself from further heartache.

See the 12 books I read in 2011 below….

 

2011 Books

1. The Giver by Lois Lowry
2. Rules of Attraction by Simone Elkeles
3. Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen
4. The Water Wars by Cameron Stracher
5. The Book of Joe by Jonathan Tropper
6. Phantom by Christopher Pike
7. Fire by Kristin Cashore
8. Dancing Aztecs by Donald E. Westlake
9. Breakfast of Champions by Kurt Vonnegut
10. Dead Reckoning by Charlaine Harris
11. One Day by David Nicholls
12. The Help by Kathryn Stockett

Picture Day

It’s picture day, so I picked out Ducky’s best.

Ducky:  “That shirt is black.  Today is green shirt day.” 

PaChomp: “I know, but it’s picture day and I want you to look good.  Wear the black over the green shirt.  DO NOT… I repeat… DO NOT take your black shirt off until after you take your picture.  DO?! YOU?! UNDERSTAND?!”

Ducky:  “COMPLETELY!”



Kindergarten 2011-2012



R. I. P. Nikon

I used to have a badass camera (it was badass in it’s time, okay).  It’s dead now.  Crashed into some concrete in the middle of a hand off.  I’m still heartbroken over it.  Here is what it looked like…

 Anyway, to drown in my sorrow, I decided to post some of my favorite shots I took with that camera.  None of these have been altered in any way.

I take that back.  Some of them may have been cropped.  But the colors and textures haven’t been jacked with.