Tooth Fairy FAIL

I’m not positive about the ages, but it’s close enough.

At age 4, I try to catch the Tooth Fairy.

I pile all of my stuffed animals as high as I can get them in the doorway of the bedroom I share with my 8 year old sister, Champ Superstar.  Based on my quantitative research, my final plan is for the Tooth Fairy to trip over all the stuffed animals so that it will fall creating a ruckus that will wake me up so I can finally witness what type of creature would want to pay cold hard cash for used up teeth.

The wall is going well.

The last stuffed animal is placed gently on top.

Once Champ Superstar realizes she can not get out of the room, she asks “why the Hell have you mortared our stuffed animals into the doorway?!”

It seemed so obvious to me, but “I’m trying to catch the Tooth Fairy,” I say, as I proceed to go through my calculations with her.  I feel like I am so brave and so beyond all of the imaginations of all of the children all over the Earth because I have found a fool-proof way to capture the Tooth Fairy in all of it’s thieving glory.

I am on top of the world!!  I will have a place in history.  People will know my name.  I will be The One Who Didn’t Get Got By The Tooth Fairy.

As I revel in my champion plan, Champ Superstar works out her own physics and says, “You Dipshit!  The Tooth Fairy FLIES!!!”

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